Whirling whimpus - [Fearsome Critter]

Whirling Whimpus - Latin: "Turbinoccissus nebuloides." - [Fearsome Critter] -AKA: 'Whirling wimpus, wumpus, wampus...etc" "The Knuckle-Dragger"

• About this Critter: Most often described as 'moving too fast to be seen' or otherwise reported by Timbermen as a "bloodthirsty carnivore with a hairy face, enormous, disproportionate paddle like front paws and diminutive lower half." it hides around the bend on hiking trails and it waits for its prey: when it hears something coming, it begins to whirl (spin) at ridiculous speeds, pirouetting with its massive arms outstretched, when it reaches 2150 r.p.m it becomes invisible like a whirlwind, it lets off an awful droning sound which seems to come from trees overhead, distracting the prey. The air begins to churn, but by the time you look to see it, its already too late. The creature pulverizes its target into a fine "syrup", which it then licks off its massive bony knuckles. (It's pray typically includes lone hikers, turkeys and even bears. It's also known to steal gin for flavouring?) 

• History & Early Appearances: The Whirling Whimpus originates as yet another earliest recorded in state forester William T Cox's bestiary Fearsome Creatures of the Lumberwoods [1910] & later in Fearsome Critters [Tyron, 1939] & so on, Cox's 1910 entry goes as follows...

THE WHIRLING WHIMPUS.

(Turbinoccissus nebuloides.)

"Occasionally it happens that inexperienced hunters and others wandering in the woods disappear completely. Guides are unable to locate them, and all kinds of theories are offered to explain the disappearances.
    From the hardwood forests of the Cumberland Mountains, Tennessee, comes the rumor of an animal called the whirling whimpus, the existence of which may throw some light upon the fate of those who fail to come back to camp. According to woodsmen who have been “looking” timber in eastern Tennessee, the whimpus is a blood-thirsty creature of no mean proportions. It has a gorilla-shaped head and body and enormous front feet. Its unique method of obtaining food is to station itself upon a trail, generally at a bend in the trail, where it stands on its diminutive hind legs and whirls. The speed is increased until the animal is invisible, and the motion produces a strange droning sound, seeming to come from trees overhead. Any creature coming along the trail and not recognizing the sound is almost certain to walk into the danger zone and become instantly deposited in the form of syrup or varnish upon the huge paws of the whimpus."

Tyrons version of the whimpus on close inspection appears to be a little bit more feline-like in the face, the bio goes as follows: 

"THE WHIRLING WHIMPUS (Turbinocissus nebuloides)

Lives along the hardwood ridges of the Southern Appalachians, and is doubtless responsible for the occasional complete disappearance of hikers in that area.
    A chunky beast, some seven feet tall, with a body about the size of a coal-oil drum and roughly furred. The equine hind legs unite at the fetlock, terminating in one broad hoof. The front legs, disproportionately long, sinewy and powerful, end in broad paddles. When standing at ease, the Whimpus usually rests these on the ground.
    The Whimpus is wholly carnivorous. Deer, bear, oxen, turkeys, humans—they're all grist to his mill. About sundown time he will take stand by a bend in the trail and begin to whirl on his single hoof. The maximum speed (2150 r.p.m.) is quickly reached and is accompanied by a peculiar droning sound. At top speed the Whimpus is practically invisible, a little dust or a few leaves eddying about being the only indications of his presence. The unwary, home-bound hiker, on hearing the odd droning, usually starts to investigate it. The instant he steps within the circle of those flying, flailing bony paddles he is deposited thereon in the form of an unctuous treacle. The Whimpus then promptly cuts his throttle, slows down, and crawls under a nearby patch of rhododendron to lick off his syrupy supper.  A Whimpus was recently reported from Nebraska by a chap whose name, age, and previous condition of veracitude are unknown to us. He swears that he saw one at precisely 11:32 P.M., on June 23, 1935, just as he was emerging from a roadside gin-mill. We are diligently seeking confirmation of this report.

[ he also notes that the whimpus is inedible: 1937]

• Wimpus Variants (similar + parallel critters):

A few Early variants to this critter include whole Felines, Avians, Apes & several other odd creatures also pop up in old stories, yarns & joke books throughout the early-mid 1900's - [There is also a common typo where in the "h" in 'whimpus', is removed, some argue that it’s not a typo or that the removal of the 'h' denotes a separate critter entirely but that's neither here nor there, most 'Wimpus' are described identically regardless] - so, here are a few 'whimpus adjacent' creatures mostly by name but also by modus operendai - [Not listed below, but also worth consideration are of course the Agropelter, Shagimaw, Hidebehind & Dungavenhooter.]

• The "Whirling Wampus" - According to Marjorie Edgar in Minnesota history [1940] (notably one year after Tyrons book came out) – "Whirling 'wampus' are fortunately rare and only seen during blizzards. It comes whirling through the snow, grabs its victim, holds him tight, and often kills him."  - I'd consider this one as belonging to the feline "Wampus cat" family of critter.

• The "Whistling Woo-Hoo" from the Ozarks, recorded by Vance Randolph in "we always lie to strangers." [1951] described as an invisible creature that 'moves like the wind' and leaves destruction in its wake, this it behaves quite similarly to the Whimpus: however, nobody knows which animal it resembles, as it always spins too fast to be seen. described like a 'living tornado' or 'dust devil'] (there are a few others like this one too of course)

• The "Dreadful Whirling Whimpus" [in Bunyan lore]:  The popular yarn shared in Paul Bunyan novels often titled the "dreadful whirling whimpus" says that Paul managed to survive a whimpus attack by walking straight through it. The creature managed only to scrape his knee, (Thanks to pauls size it was merely a flesh wound) Paul then beats the creature 'to tar' with his bare hands and it was never seen again. - Other such stories describe the creature slightly differently, and credit the creatures death/capture to Pauls giant hunting dog with backwards limbs 'Elmur.' (see also: "Split-dog") - sometimes Paul manages to capture the whimpus and keeps it as a pet, using it as a shredder or to dig wells. 

[whirling whimpus as drawn by Glen Rounds in Ol'Paul the mighty logger 1936  (a few early papers credited rounds for the creation of the beast, but this is false.) Notably this take paints it as an 'Auger type' of critter, those who commonly have drills built in drills on their bodies. (See also: "Augers") it appears that Tyrons description of the critter is at least based on this ones description.] 

[elmer vs whimpus page 105 paul bunyan & his great blue ox. 1964.

[Whirling 'wimpus'  Song of paul bunyan and tony beaver 1964]

• The "Whirling Whimpus" A humorous, insectoid(?) & non fatal variant to the whimpus, this version illustrated and included in the joke book, ripsnorters and rib-ticklers [1958] :

• The 'Wympsis' - [only tangentially related.] - a Critter of which Tyron only included a single line about in the previously mentioned 'Fearsome critters" [1939] along side other 'Creatures of limited range & description.' - There's no description for it included there, just a name. However later in 'Gillygaloos and Gollywhoppers' [Ennis Rees & Sir Quinten Blake 1969] Ennis Rees also decided to elaborate on it in a poem calling it 'a creature which likes to 'roll around in leaves & pitch!' - [more about it here]

• In the modern day: the Whirling Whimpus is often lumped in and classified as a type of "Sasquatch", "Devil Monkey" or even a "Nape" (North American Ape) [much to the chagrin of Cryptozoologists & Folkloric researchers on either side of the isle. (myself included, despite the fact that i chose to draw it squatch-like & classify it as such.) -- I'd suppose this classification is the result of Cox describing its as "gorilla-shaped" & having "enormous front feet." (which are of course often misinterpreted as 'Bigfoots' namesake.) - it should be noted that when not whirling, the creature is said to move using its hands instead. (On occasion, its been nick-named the "Knuckle Dragger") - Some modern depictions also sometimes illustrate the creature with devil-like horns. --However, it should be noted that everything to do with the wimpus is up to interpretation, most early descriptions simply state that the wimpus is "unseen when it attacks." or that “it is the shape of wind' or 'it moves too fast to be described or rationalized.' - Thus the whole idea to the creature was that nobody could truly say what for certain whatever creature it might have resembled, as nobody survived an encounter with it. - Whatever it was, it was to blame for mysterious disappearances. (see also: hidebehind) -- Although 'Sasquatch' in mythology goes back much further, the modern concept of 'bigfoot' wouldn't enter the popular consciousness until the early 1920's. I also feel it's important to note that during the early 1900s, pop culture in general was experiencing something of a "gorilla boom" likely caused by the recent discovery of the (Silver-back) Mountain Gorilla which was freshly accepted by science in 1902! Soon enough almost all parts of american of pop culture & comics began to feature gorillas in someway.

 (...i suppose it could also be based off of general gorilla behaviour too..)

• In earlier papers: mentions of a vaguely described creature called the 'Whimpus' --or rather decidedly 'Not a Whimpus' are also mentioned in a few news articles from 1907-1909 newspapers, the word seems to be used as a catchall word to describe an "unknown creature." (similar to how the term "wampus" was used to describe "undefined imaginary animals." ) - perhaps similarly, the idea of the 'whimpus' began as a slang word for 'unknown creature' a while before cox's publishing in 1910?

Giving some credence to this, is that The 'Whirling Whimpus' is also mentioned by name a Michigan Forestry pamphlet [1910-1914.] where-in a forestry assistant 'gets to know' various 'hazing pranks' & critters habits such as "The 'Whirling Whimpus', 'Whiffle'(See also: Snipe) and the 'Sidehill Gouger.' the pamphlet dates this mention to 09' about a full year before Cox's book! (Though, it's difficult to say for certain if this is accurate, someone local would have to look into this further.)

[snapshot from pamphlets on forestry.]

–anyway that's about all i could find for early information on the Whirling Whimpus, I'd suppose that one could ultimately summarize this critter simply by saying it was "a way to haze tourists popular in the early 1900s, and that classifying it as type of 'Sasquatch' is a misnomer at best, though because of its vague appearance, I suppose it could be???" and saved us all a bit of reading/typing/further confusion? --but that's a bit boring, i suppose! Hope you enjoyed my ramblings.

Art sticker by @Samkalensky (yo that's me!) Part of my Fearsome Critters collection of stickers, check my shop and follow for more :)